Walk With Me
Have you ever wanted to mentor or felt led to mentor someone else? We would love to hear from you! The mission of the Women’s Mentoring Ministry is to know God more deeply through intentional friendship by sharing life, seeking the Lord, studying His word, and praying for each other.
1. I’m interested in being mentored. How am I paired with someone?
Take a look at the women you know at Calvary. Is there someone you are drawn to, whom you think would be a good mentor for you? If so, approach her with the idea. You could invite her for coffee and ask her if she is open to meet regularly with you. Women are often willing when they are asked! We encourage this method and call it a self-pairing. If a potential mentor you pursued is not able to enter into this type of relationship for whatever reason or if you don’t have a woman in mind, then skip to Step 2.
Once you find a mentor or, alternatively, desire to be paired with a mentor in our program, fill out an application by clicking a button above on this page.
If you are self-paired, have your applications filled out, and have communicated to a mentoring team member you are pairing yourselves, then you are ready to jump in and start!
If you applied to be mentored but are not self-paired and have filled out an application, one of us on the mentoring team will reach out to you. We will then establish a time for one or two of us to meet with you in person to get to know you a little better. It is important to us to help you find a meaningful connection with a mentor. The mentoring team then prays, asking God to direct us in facilitating a pairing. We will look at mentors in our program who are unmatched and consider if someone may be a good fit. If so, we will give you their contact information and ask you to reach out to them to arrange a meeting. At this point there is no commitment. The meeting is for the mentee (and mentor) to get a sense if the match feels like a good fit. If it does, then you let a mentoring team member know and you are good to start. If there are doubts, you may let the woman know you’d like to pray about this decision. If you know right away it’s not the right fit and if you are comfortable, you may let the woman know (she may feel the same way, and that’s okay!). Or, if it’s not comfortable, it’s okay to let the woman know you are undecided. You can then give a mentoring team member feedback and let her know we should continue praying for a mentor for you. We will communicate the status to the woman you met with.
PLEASE NOTE: We discuss with all mentors in our program the importance of a good fit, and they know not to take it personally if a mentee wants to keep looking!
2. I have a heart for women and would enjoy mentoring someone. How do I start?
First of all, THANK YOU! We need mentors and are so grateful for your willingness to serve in this way!
Fill out an application using the buttons above on this page.
One of us from the mentoring team will contact you and set up a time to meet. We are interested in getting to know you a little more before pairing you with a mentee.
The mentoring team prayerfully considers which mentee in our program you might connect with. If we see a potential pairing, we will give your contact information to the mentee and ask her to reach out to you to set up a short meeting. This meeting does not entail any commitment. It is simply a way to introduce yourselves, chat a little bit and see if there is a chemistry there. This could be over coffee or after a church service, or whatever works well. Our program is mentee driven, meaning the focus is intended to be around the needs a mentee has. Therefore, we put the ball in her court. After the two of you meet initially, she decides if she wants to go forward with a commitment with you or keep options open. If she wants to commit, she will communicate that to you and to a person on our team. You then are good to start. If she does not feel a chemistry with you, that is okay! Chances are it would probably not be the right fit for you too. She will either let you know or will process that with us on the team and we will let you know she desires to keep looking. We then continue this process until you are paired.
3. If we are self-paired, why should we fill out applications?
We encourage you to fill out applications so we can come alongside you and give you support, resources, encouragement and pray for you. We provide a structure for the women who mentor in our program to build relationships with one another, and venues to ask questions and receive training. Being part of a bigger community with like purposes benefits everyone!
4. If we are not self-paired, how long does it take to be connected to a mentor or mentee after I submit an application?
The time frame varies. Sometimes we have just the right woman available and you can start meeting right away. Sometimes we have women in our program that are available, but they are not the right fit. If that’s the case, we hold on to your application and continue to pray, asking God to provide just the right person because finding that deeper, meaningful connection is a vital part to spiritual growth in a mentoring relationship. We are comfortable waiting on God and His Spirit leading us for direction and provision. Note, new women are continually applying to the program, but we also have a number of women who remain in our program after the sun sets on a committed relationship and they become available to mentor or be mentored again. The whole process is fluid and Spirit driven.
5. Once we are paired, how do we start?
You arrange an initial meeting in person. We recommend discussing expectations right away: how often will you meet and where, will it be a set schedule or more flexible, would you like to connect via texting or phone calls between meeting in person, etc. We also recommend discussing how you’ll spend your time. Do you want to simply chat about life, run errands together, go for walks, pray together, do a Bible or book study, meet over coffee or a meal? It is up to the two of you to find what works well for both.
6. What kind of time commitment is required?
There are no hard rules here. Our program is mentee driven, meaning it is intended to meet the needs the mentee has. We understand life is busy and members of Calvary can live in different towns, sometimes further away. With that said, we encourage you to try to meet in person at least twice a month simply because relationships need momentum to build. Some of our pairs text often between meeting to connect. Some chat on the phone when they are able. It’s up to the two of you to find that balance of juggling busy schedules and creating space to build trust and connection with each other.
7. What should the relationship look like once we’re paired?
There is a two-part answer here:
1 – What you do: That is up to the two of you, but the way you spend your time should be something that works well for both of you. We’ve had pairs in our program with a young mom and an empty nester, and the empty nester comes alongside her in day to day life, helping to clean out her pantry while chatting and connecting, or taking a baby for a walk in a park. We’ve had pairs who love to do a Bible or book study together and let that springboard into rich conversations about living out faith. Or, some seek fun things to do and get a mani / pedi together, or meet at the gym to work out then grab a cup of coffee or tea after. The important thing is to find what works so you can be present with each other, sharing life, and building connection.
2 – How you do what you do: A mentoring relationship is different than a friendship. A mentor will ask you about your relationship with God. She is there to help connect day to day experiences with God’s Word and what is true. She will not have all the answers, but she will listen, ask questions, open God’s Word to explore together what it says. She will pray for you and with you. She will invite your thoughts, perceptions, and opinions, and be that person to bounce around hard choices with or process difficult aspects of faith with.
8. What do I do if something comes up in a mentor-mentee relationship that is uncomfortable, discouraging, awkward, or difficult?
When you are paired, you will be designated a point person on the mentoring team to support you through the season of that mentoring relationship, however long that is. This point person will be checking in with you regularly to see how things are going. At any time, you are welcome to contact that team member to receive support for whatever problems may surface. We will engage and help you.
9. What happens when one of us wants to stop meeting?
There can be a variety of reasons why one person or both want to stop meeting. Maybe life circumstances change such as a move, a job change, a new baby, or health problems, and the time one had to meet regularly diminishes. Maybe the relationship is not going as deep as one wanted, and the commitment grows to be taxing. Maybe there is not as much in common as you first thought, and you are ready to move on. Maybe you have an awesome connection, but it just doesn’t work to keep meeting regularly and the relationship shifts naturally to on ongoing friendship that is less structured. Whatever the reason, this happens all the time and is okay. If you are comfortable, share your need to stop meeting with your mentor or mentee. If the reason you are wanting to stop is complicated or feels awkward or difficult, please reach out to your point person or a mentoring team member, and we will help you.
10. If I’m interested in becoming a mentor, how will the mentoring team support me?
Once you apply to our program you will be designated a point person on the mentoring team whom you will meet in person and remain in contact with over the season you mentor a woman. This point person is there to pray for you, answer questions, give you support, more resources or whatever you need in your role as a mentor. We also will put a number of free resources into your hands, including the book “Organic Mentoring” by Sue Edwards and Barbara Neumann, and a set of handouts such as dialog prompts to take you into deeper in conversations, generational differences to be aware of, a list of book resources if you choose to do a study with your mentee, etc. And, we provide three (hopefully fun) interactive training sessions a year for all our mentors which we encourage you to come to. These happen around October, February and June, and they are a great way to meet other mentors, hear ideas of what works well for others, and share your own ideas and questions.
11. How do I get more information?
You may email the mentoring team with general inquiries or contact any of the team members directly:
General Inquiries | email@example.com
Sharon Heintzman | firstname.lastname@example.org | 412.337.4718
Jen Markhamemail@example.com |703.731.0281
Ruth Anderson | firstname.lastname@example.org | 720.503.6197